Today is my 34th birthday.

If I would have asked my 18 year old self to predict where I’d be at 34, my current state would not be my answer.As of this Sunday, I will have a clean slate. Meaning, I will have sold, donated, disposed of all of the possessions that I thought I had to have to “be” someone. And I’m moving home with my mom. I love my mom for taking me in. And in all honesty, I don’t technically need to live with her. I’m choosing to and she’s wonderful enough to allow me to move it to get back on track. What once took a large truck and three men to move me, has been whittled down to a 10 ft. u-haul and my uncle and brother.

Today is my 34th birthday.
I am starting completely over.

I have accepted the fact that I may never be a wife, but I’ll never give up on finding true love.
I have accepted the fact that I may never be a mother, but I’ll always be an amazing aunt, babysitter, mentor.
I have accepted the fact that I may never “run” a half marathon, but I’ll walk one every year, maybe twice a year.
I have accepted the fact that I may never be super-duper skinny, but I will be healthy.
I have accepted the fact that there may be a much greater purpose for me, and I am so excited to see what that is.

I’m doing what I love – writing (even if it’s only this lonely blog).
I’m working with children through Girls on the Run.
I’m becoming financially stable for the first time in my life.
I’m becoming emotionally stable for the first time in my life. (No, I’m not crazy!)
I’m committed to becoming healthy for  the first time in my life.

I will believe in me for the first time, maybe ever.
I will listen to that little voice inside my head when I’m in a bad relationship.
I will not let a man dictate my future again.
I will peacefully remove those from my life who do not support me and lift me up.
I will travel more and visit those that I love.
I will make sure those that I love know it everyday.
I will forgive those who have hurt me.
I will leave my past in the past, no more haunting.
I will continue to be a great friend, sister, daughter, aunt, co-worker, volunteer, and any other role I’m forgetting.
I will focus more on living each day to its fullest rather than worrying about the details.
I will forgive myself for my past mistakes.
I will make the most of my clean slate!

Today is my 34th birthday.
And it is going to be an amazing year!

Cheer!