Blocked, Bored and Broke

Happy Tuesday friends. Why is it that the first day back to a normal schedule after a long weekend is excruciating? Super excited about a four day week, though.

So which topic shall I tackle first…..block, boredom or broke. Hmmmm……Let’s start with……

Writer’s Block……
It sucks. I need to write a quick “My Coaching Experience” note for Girls on the Run. Seriously, like maybe 200 words. I’m pretty sure I tweeted, facebooked and blogged twice that many about GOTR. What the heck is my problem now? I also have about 4-5 blog posts in my head that I’m struggling to get through my fingers. And I need to compose a few articles for the magazine at work. But nope, got nothing, nada, blah!

Wanna know my problem that I just figured out while typing this blog?

I’m freaking BORED! Remember the last three months of posts where I’ve been so busy I can’t see straight? Yep. That’s gone.
No more coaching. No more half marathon. No more moving. No more packing and unpacking. (Work is super busy but I decided with this new job I would not take things home.) Upon arriving home at 5:05 this evening, I have done all my laundry, emptied the dishwasher, cleaned the litter boxes, vacuumed the entire house, and cleaned my bathroom. I’ve even had time to watch an Oprah interview with Carrie Underwood, eat dinner and work on this post.

All of this free time to clean and learn about how blissfully happy Carrie is has created this bad place in Pamland where I have entirely too much time to think and over analyze and then think more about all those things I’ve over analyzed. It’s a super fun place to be. I’m thinking so much that I’m not doing anything that I should be doing (see writer’s block above).

There is one thing I’ve been doing each night for about a week now – trying to figure out my BROKE ass budget. Or lack thereof. I know some of you may of had that thought during the bored portion of this post – “go do something” or “call a friend, grab a drink”. That’s super and all, but when I have exactly $52.79 to last me until June 5th, I can’t really DO much of anything. I skipped a dear friends house warming party this weekend because I’m so scared of running out of money and/or gas. Pathetic. And to be totally honest, dear blog, I’m already playing the float game. I have a automatic payment that should come out on the 3rd but since it’s a weekend, I’m hoping praying it won’t hit until the 5th. So, technically I’m negative $113.83.

So, back to my budget woes, I’ve added everything up, put in all my expenses, estimated for groceries, gas and even put a bit in savings and I should have a sizable amount of “life” money after each check. But no. Before my last paycheck, I had $.17 in the bank. That’s no lie, no drama. I seriously do not get it.  I’m not frivolous. My major expenses are student loans, car and health insurance. I like my McDonald’s Diet Coke ($1.09). I bring my lunch at least 2-3 times a week. I download the free crappy books to my Kindle (that was a gift for Christmas two years ago). I thought by now, things would be better. I live with my mother for crying out loud!

Maybe…I’ll take the month of June and track every penny in and out. (See over analyzing above.)

Maybe…I’ll focus on my next race and run like the wind. Maybe I’ll work on these extra 40 pounds.

Maybe…that will be my blog for the month of June – a daily journal of my spending, eating and exercise. (Seriously considering this one!)

Maybe…I’ll just go to bed. Oh, wait, my sheets are still in the dryer.

Was your first day back after Memorial day excruciating? Are you bored? Blocked (writing only, no TMI)? Or broke? Any tips, tricks, money tree seeds? Will you hate me if I blog everyday in June about money, food and sweat?


Memorial Day Motivation Monday

A special Memorial Day Motivation Monday

Thank you to all of those who sacrifice their time, family and lives to serve.
Thank you to my grandfathers, my father, my uncles who protected and continue to protect their family.
Thank you to all of the families at home, praying, waiting and struggling to live each day without their loved one.

Thank you for the chills I get when the national anthem is performed.
Thank you for the tears that well up during a fly over.
Thank you for the motivation to do something more than I am so the sacrifice isn’t in vain.

Today is a day to be grateful for all you have, a day to say a prayer for those in service and a day of remembrance.


OneAmerica 500 Fesitval Mini Marathon Recap

The recap you’ve all been waiting for…..right? HA! I think the real reason I’m even putting this out onto the interwebs is so I can laugh at it next year when I dominate this race. And yes, for all my pity partying, whining and complaining, I am planning on doing it again. And will make it my bitch. Tough talk for a race that’s 50 weeks away!

Let’s start with race morning….
Up on time – check.
Gear ready to go – check.
Water, water and more water – check.
Cat nearly biting off my finger – check.
Running out the door five minutes later after making sure I didn’t need stitches and bandaging my finger – Check. (P.S. I was secretly  hoping to drive to the ER rather than the Mini Marathon. Pathetic – Check.)

The drive downtown from the northside of Indy was good….until 52nd street. Then people just got stupid. So I took the back way, so did many of the stupid people.

Finally, parked at IUPUI and headed toward the starting line. I was in corral Q but my friends were in X so I had decided the week before to start with them.

Hey – do you know how large a 35,000 race is with spectators? About 20 minutes and just over a mile (I’m estimating) later, I’m in corral X. With no friends. Then the texting begins.

Me: “I’m in corral X under the St. Elmo’s sign.”
Niki: “Are you on the right or left side.”
Me: “I have no idea. I’m under the St. Elmo’s sign.”
Niki: “We’re on the left.”
Me: “I’m under the St. Elmo’s sign. Oh no, we’re moving.”

They finally found me. (I was on the right.)

The gun went off. And 35 minutes later we crossed the starting line. (35,000 runners/walkers = bat shit insane)

My Race Plan
Jog 1/4 mile. Walk 3/4 mile. Every mile. Keep it simple. Don’t die. Finish.

Mile 1
I felt amazing. I was with my friends. I was digging the crowd. I was loving the music. And at .4 miles, I walked and let the girls go on. Smartest thing I did all day.

Mile 2
Have I mentioned that 35,000 people are a lot of people? I’m bobbin’ and weavin’ like it was my job. And stuck with  my race plan.

Mile 3
WAHOOO!!!! I just finished a 5K. I’m so almost done! Wait, I have to finish 3 more of those plus some. Crap. Well, keep moving.

Mile 4
I seriously have to pee. And there are long lines at the port-o-lets. I really hate port-o-lets. This was the first mile I walked completely. I had thought I would run again. That would be a lie.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words so I’ll show you my splits from my Garmin. Then I’ll give you some highlights….that I remember.

Worth a thousand words.

Mile 6 (Indianapolis Motor Speedway)
Just before finishing mile 6, I had to stop and pee. We were inside the track. There were real potty’s. My shorts were relatively comfortable prior to this break. They were never the same after. Have I mentioned yet that it was HOT? And humid? And muggy? I could have probably peed in my shorts and no one would have been the wiser. (Teasing, kind of)

Mile 7 (Indianapolis Motor Speedway)
Good God – how on Earth do these drivers, pit crews, etc work on this track in MAY and AUGUST? I need to call my cousin’s husband or give him a big hug next time I see him (he’s on Carl Edward’s pit crew – I’m kind of famous-in-law – not really – I digress). But seriously, crazy hot. When I’m typically at the track, I’m in the shade or the bleachers with a cold beverage in my hand. Side note – I think I wrote this part of the blog in my head while walking mile 7. I came up with famous-in-law. It made me giggle out loud. Totally not weird, right?

Mile 8 (Indianapolis Motor Speedway)
This is where the infamous mug shot front page shot was taken. This was also the moment I almost quit (#1). And the moment they put out the yellow caution flags because of the heat. I’ve mentioned the heat, right? And one of the many moments I thought I would die.

Mile 9
Shade – sweet Jesus – Shade. And then, it was gone. I’m pretty sure I’m going to have a nasty blister on the ball of my foot.

Mile 10
I’m pretty sure that nasty blister on the ball of my foot just popped. Not pretty sure, confirmed. I could stop now (almost quit moment #2). No one would fault me. This hurts like a son-ov-a. Then, I decide to suck it up. I try making friends someone to chat with, but everyone around me is bitter and hot and tired.

Mile 11
My music was the only thing that got me through. And the kind people who live along 10th street spraying us with their hoses. Those people ROCK!

Mile 12
We turned onto the bridge to cross the White River to the finish line. I heard angels singing. The birds were chirping. There were rainbows and puppy dogs. And then it just kept going….on….and on…..and on…..I swear it was the cruelest of cruel jokes. The last mile was at least 10 or 11 miles. So really, I think I completed a marathon.

Mile 13
So you’d think .1 mile would be super easy. There was no amount of money, no handsome man, no golden ticket that would have persuaded me to run that last tenth of a mile. I did manage to lift my arms, kind of, when crossing. I had finished.

Once crossing the finish line, I did not stop. I knew that the moment I stopped was the location my body would be in for the next few hours. Water, cookie, picture – now I needed to find my friends.

Niki – “My phone is almost dead. Call Chris.”
Me – “I’m done. Where are you?”
Chris – “B2”
Me – “I have no idea what that means.”
Chris (Now Niki) – “Where are you?”
Me – “Standing under a tree. I see B1 and B4.”
Chris/Niki – “I don’t know where that is.”
Me – “I’m not moving. I’m standing under the B1 sign. Come get me.”

They found me and I sat under a tree with my friends while we waited for a couple others.

We finished.

We took a picture.
I walked slowly to my car.
I called my mom to ask her to order me a pizza. She agreed.
I showered. Ate pizza. And slept all afternoon.

And I will look back on this post in one year and giggle.

The OneAmerica 500 Festival Mini Marathon race and recap is complete. Now I can stop thinking about it!

Motivation Monday

These girls are my Motivation.

These are my girls during our Season Celebration!

I was blessed to spend my Tuesday and Thursday afternoons with these girls for the past 12 weeks. They have kept me motivated. They have kept me busy. They most definitely kept me humble. They called me out. They made me laugh. They made me cry. They made me tired.

Ready and waiting in Corral E!

Our last event together was a 5K race. And even though most of us were up and moving by 5:30 AM, we were smiling and happy and ready for face and hair paint. Some of us, as you can see, were a bit happier than others!

Already perfected the finish line smiling photo!

Anytime I want to quit or feel too far away from the finish line, I will always think of there smiling face, the pride, the excitement and the sheer joy. I will be reminded this is what it’s all about. After all, if you’re not having fun….why do it.

And that, my friends, is Motivation Monday.

My Tude

It has been quite a week in Pamland. Did something tragic happen? Nope. Did you get fired? Not yet. Did you have a great big pitty party for yourself and let it consume your entire world? Why, yes, yes I did.

It has literally taken me over a week to get rid of this tude that is just ruining my day. And it’s my own doing. It’s my own crazy, think-to-much brain that has taken over my entire life and making me feel awful! Besides my tude, I have the most unrealistic expectations ever! Some examples….

I finished up the Advocare 24-day challenge. I lost 3 lbs and a total of 20 inches – while packing, moving, training for a half marathon, carb loading for a half marathon, coaching, working and adjusting to these major life changes. My goal was 10 pounds, 12 inches. I lost 5 inches off my waist and 4 off my hips. I am visibly thinner. Yet, I continued to beat myself up about my results. (FYI – there is a more detailed post about the last part of my challenge in the works. Stay tuned.)

I walked (with approximately 20 minutes of jogging) a half marathon. I was completely mortified that my picture was on the front page of the paper. Hey fatty, let’s be in the paper. YAY! But I was the fatty in the paper for FINISHING A HALF MARATHON. Not for being a fatty. I wanted to run the entire things. Sure thing Pammie! Sit on your ass while unemployed from September (my first half marathon) until January. Then get a job and wonder why this major life change is interfering with your training plan. Then stress over not training, and stop training. Then expect to run a full half marathon, when it’s 4,000 degrees, with 35,000 of your closest friends. (FYI – #2 – A recap of this episode in my life is coming as well, stay tuned!)

Unrealistic expectations. Check.
Crazy, uncontrollable, irrational thinking. Check.
Stress. Check.
Evilness to those that love me. Check.
Avoidance of most friends. Check.

Until this weekend, I was a basket case. I literally stomped my feet like a child who did not get her way. (More than once.) However, this tude is gone and new plans are in the works. I’ll share more soon…..stay tuned.


Motivation Monday (on Tuesday)

Sorry so late with Motivation Monday (Tuesday).This is more of a personal Motivation Monday.

Yep. Front page of the Sunday Indianapolis Star.

Shall we have a caption contest?

  • “Good God woman, get out of the way!”
  • “Oh how I wish I was you right now?”
  • “I’ll cut a bitch!”

Feel free to add your own.

Nothing is more motivating than a dozen photo of you struggling through a half marathon and realizing your “inner tube” could save most of the member of the Titanic.

If I can’t laugh at myself, I’ll just cry and that is no fun!

Meanest Mom Ever

Not my mom! She’s the bestest! I live here and she like to make dinner!!

I’m the meanest mom ever! Check out the “lion cut” on the Punkin and Pouncer. And the Ugg boots! They were really cold last weekend, but today they LOVE me again!

Purdy Pouncer

Look – they love each other! Or plotting my death!

Don’t mind the rolls, she gets them honest!! 🙂

Next stop…..Mini Marathon…..Lord willing!