Not Too Shabby 2012

Happy New Year! I hope everyone is doing well on this fine January morning!

I know that once the new year hits, you’re not supposed to look back but I haven’t done a 2012 recap yet so I’m doing it now. Based on my “projects” for 2012, I would call 2012 an absolute fail. Let’s briefly recap these so called “projects”:

Project #1 – Be nicer to myself.
Project #2 – Be true to myself and like myself for who I am.
Project #3 – Run like the wind! Or at least a gently breeze. And do lots of other workouts too!
Project #4 – Grow this fancy little blog.
Project #5 – Find a job/gainful employment/go back to school/move out-of-state/decide not to move out-of-state/stop living in the land of limbo.

I did provide a mid-year recap which was less than stellar. And not much as changed since then…expect Project #5.

Project #1 and #2 will always be a work in progress. I am a perfectionist and a people-pleaser. These two things do not go together well because you will never please every person all the time. This is hard for me to swallow because I want to make everyone happy and rather than work on this, I’ve kind of just fell into a whole of not making anyone happy including myself which is just not nice.

Project #3, well, honestly, I stopped running after the Geist 5K. Why? I have no idea. That’s a lie – I do know. See Project #1 and #2. I wanted running to come naturally to me. I read all of these blogs from these amazing ladies who run like the wind, and I wanted to be one of them. I wanted to be one of them – immediately. I wanted to see improvement with every run. I wanted to drop lbs like it was my job. I wanted to be able to annihilate a basket of bread with a side of pasta and not gain an ounce and be fueled for my next run.

Project #4 – I feel I have grown this little blog. I have new people following me with every post. I’m sure if I just tweeted when I write new posts, I could do so much more. Yet again, see Project #1 and #2 – I don’t feel lefty is promotion worthy yet.

Project #5 – NAILED IT! For the first time in a few years, I had a job almost every day of 2012! And in my wildest dreams, I never thought that would excite me so much – I always assumed that would be a given. And, I finally made the move I’ve been dreaming about since I was 20. And I am loving every minute being a California girl!

But in reality – 2012 really wasn’t that bad. I may have failed at a few goals but I did so much more instead!

  • I celebrated with my friends more – birthdays, promotions, weddings, graduations – I was there.
  • I was a coach for Girls on the Run. And I was a damn good one.
  • I was an asset to the association I worked for – without question. I planned events, ran the office, fixed the accounting and generally made people want to be involved again. I did great work!
  • I walk/ran a half marathon. The largest half in the United States. Not stellar but I did it.
  • I spent more time with my favorite monkeys (nieces and nephew).
  • I had one date.
  • I found a new love. (And it’s not the training schedule)
  • I moved to California. (!!!!!!!)

All said, 2012 was a year that had to happen in order to lay the ground work for 2013 and years to come. And as I sit here on January 1st thinking about 2012, I smile knowing of all the great things to come!

Happy New Year!


New Year, New Do

Things have been a bit crazy since my letter to the Universe last week. And yes, the Universe is still messing with me on a consistent basis. But I don’t want to write about all that just yet!

I’ve been putting off getting a hair cut because my fundage has been quite low. I was due in December but decided to wait until yesterday. I’m religious about getting at least a trim every 6-8 weeks so waiting until 10 weeks was torture! I had also been toying with the idea of chopping it all off.

See, even in December I was dreaming of the great chop!

(Note to self: Must learn to make these images more clear in the near future.)

So last night was the great chop. And as you can see, I got lots of great advice.

I did not go with the buzz cut!

(Note to self: Seriously, figure it out!)

As you might be able to read in my blurry image above, my only requirement was a pony tail. And Miss Joni did not fail me. I have never felt so comfortable with a stylist. I just come in, sit down, give her minimal direction and get great hair every time! I wanted to get a picture of the massive amount of hair on the floor but she was afraid I might freak out a bit so it was swept up before I could snap one. It was a good 4-5 inch cut. I’m pretty sure I lost a solid 2 pounds and will take 10 seconds off my mile time with the new do – totally reasonable, right?

Look at that little nubbin! So cute!

Unfortunately, I’m no good at styling my hair the day after I get it cut. You’ll have to wait for a glamor shot!

Do you get your “hair did” regularly or very rarely? Regular stylist or new every time? Planning any extreme makeovers?

Dear Universe

Dear Universe,

You are currently being quite the pain. I get close to making a decision and you bring me a reason to second guess it. I would appreciate a clear, concise path and you are just not cooperating. This has been a stressful few months – can you please just give me a break? Trying to follow your signs is like trying to navigate the Autobahn.



P.S. However, thank you for the 60 degree day in January. I loved running in shorts today! Feel free to keep that streak up!

2012 Project List

Resolutions? To-do lists? Goals? What do you choose to call them?

This year I’m going with Projects. I’ve spent the last two years as a project manager and this is where I feel the most comfortable. Resolution always feels so HUGE and daunting. Projects can be huge ; however they are broken down into steps or stages for completion. I know for a fact I can juggle multiple projects. And I feel accomplishment by completing different stages/tasks for a project.

Project #1 – Be nicer to myself. I am incredibly hard on myself. I am harder on myself than I would ever be on anyone else. I hold myself to complete unrealistic expectations. I have a great vision of who I should be and when my actual actions don’t meet that vision, I give myself one heck of a talking to! I’m going to do this by:

  • Setting more realistic expectations for everything in my life.
  • Forgive myself quickly when I don’t meet those expectations. No one is perfect.
  • My past is just that, past. Why relive it? I can’t do anything about it. Just forgive, find the lesson and move on. Stop analyzing past events – pushing people away, staying too long, missing an opportunity. If it was supposed to be, it would be. Letting go will be huge for me this year.
  • Be true to myself. (See Project #2)

Project #2 – Be true to myself and like myself for who I am. Sounds simply, huh? I’ve been trapped in this mindset that I have to be more than I am which leads me to making plans that I don’t want to keep, which leads to anxiety and then beat myself up (Project #1). This vicious cycle has to stop. Below are some things I need to learn to embrace and be proud of because they are ME:

  • I’m a homebody. And I’m happy being a homebody. I’m happy to stay home, watch a movie, read a book, chat with friends, etc. When I am alone, I am not lonely (most of the time). It really is ok.
  • I don’t have 400 friends who want to hang out all the time and I am A-OK with this. I have a handful of amazing true friends that would be there for me in a second and I would for them. I do need to make a more conscious effort to see them/reach out more in 2012.
  • I do like to go out – lunch, dinner, drinks, movies, etc. I’m no longer a “clubber”. I don’t want to drink so much I can’t function the next day. Small, intimate gatherings are perfect. Outings with a purpose – such as watching My Kentucky Wildcats win another NCAA championship on the big screen at a local pub, celebrating birthdays, weddings, psychic readings etc.
  • I like to sleep. No, it’s not depression, just sleep. And currently, I’m unemployed. If  I want to sleep until 11 every day, I will. And I will still get everything done that I need to – promise!
  • I’m a planner! I’m OCD sometimes. Love it or don’t – it is what it is. And sometimes I get that overwhelmed by to do lists, it happens. Sometimes I try to take over (the world), it happens.
  • I eat like crap. I love cheese, queso, bread, wine, beer, cookies, pizza, diet coke – I could go on here all day. I will never be vegan or vegetarian. I know I should try to eat better. And I do eat better. Sometimes. And that’s probably how it will stay, for now.
  • I hate dating. I’m taking my profiles off of the multiple dating websites that are doing me absolutely no good. I’m going to trust that when my Prince Charming is ready for me, he’ll find me.

Project #3 – Run like the wind! Or at least a gently breeze. And do lots of other workouts too!

  • I will run a race every month (except January).
  • My goal pace is a 12 minute mile.
  • I will take 40-60 minutes off my half marathon pace. Currently it’s 3:23 (I walked most of it.) I’d like to finish the Indianapolis Mini Marathon in May with a time of 2:23 – 2:40.
  • I will run a 5k in 35 minutes or less. I’m currently at 41.01.
  • I will purchase new shoes before I start hard-core training in February. Shoes made specifically for running.
  • I will log 500 miles in 2012 with my fancy new Garmin 405.
  • I will attend 100 fitness classes. (I pay for the stupid gym – might as well use it!)

Project #4 – Grow this fancy little blog. And by grow, I mean let someone else know about it besides my mom. (HI MOM!!)

  • I will blog 2-4 times a week.
  • I will determine the actual theme of this blog – fitness, weight-loss, random pam-isms. So many possibilities.
  • I will figure out how to get noticed, gain followers – I have no idea who to do this but I will figure it out. Maybe I’ll even blog about it! HA!
  • I will comment on at least 5 other blogs per week.
  • I will become a better writer. I’m sure there are tons of errors in these posts and I will get better! (This is my plea to keep reading through my grammatical errors. Thanks!)

Project #5 – Find a job/gainful employment/go back to school/move out-of-state/decide not to move out-of-state/stop living in the land of limbo. (Don’t worry mom, these projects are not in order of importance!) The limbo has to stop. I need a clear direction.

  • I will have clear direction by February 1, 2012. Promise.

As I reread this, I noticed two themes that I typically resolve in January that are not specifically included this year – Weight loss and love. I’ve decided these will come. Once I’m right with me, the rest will follow.

2012 is the year of the Pam! Hope you stick around to see the completed projects!

What are your resolutions, goals, to-dos, projects? Do you make them? Do you stick to them?

My Year in Review

2011 was definitely a year of highs and lows.


  • Work was busy, busy, busy.
  • I had decided to end an abusive relationship in late 2010. However, he promised to get help so I hung on. But in January, it was really over and I was devastated. Because work was so busy, I decided not to process anything.


  • Icepocalypse 2011 – Trapped in my lonely apartment for 3 days, now plenty of time to process the death of my relationship. Not pretty. Not pretty at all. Probably the lowest I have ever been in my entire life.
  • Trip to San Francisco to see my wonderful friends Amber and Greg. Monterrey Bay, Chinese New Year Parade, Napa – Just want  I needed!

Seriously, it looks like I belong in Napa - right?


  • Moved in with a roommate – not best friends but I’m rarely alone. Plus a huge cost savings!
  • A wonderful weekend adventure with Renee to Camp Chesterfield with 3 psychic readings!
  • My very good friend Nicole’s bachelorette party.

April – Birthday Month (Yes, I get an entire month!)

  • My University of Kentucky Wildcats made it to the final four! We’ll be in the final game this year (fingers crossed).
  • Trip to Florida with my BFF Crystal including a visit with Toni, Alex, Emma and Annie!
Toni – One of my favorite people on the planet.
  • MY BIRTHDAY – Also known as my favorite holiday!
  • Nicole and Eric’s wedding.


  • A few dates, nothing promising, but at least I was dating again!
  • Remember how work was so busy, well it wasn’t in May – I was laid off.
  • I decided to become a gypsy – you have something you need done, I’ll do it! Babysitting, moving, packing, unpacking, QuickBooks setup, tradeshows, sales….you get the idea.
  • Fell in love with running!!


  • Fell in love with hot yoga!
  • Lots of laying by the pool.


  • Motley Crue/Poison Concert – Never in a million years did I ever see myself attending this concert. Not my scene, but fun!
  • Discovery of lefty.
  • More laying by the pool.


  • Girls trip to Nashville with my 4 best friends from high school!

    In the hotel lobby before the fun. You're welcome girls!

  • My very first attempt at a 5K run. (Not very successful.)
  • Decided I was going to run/walk a half marathon.
  • Jimmy Buffett Concert

Wasting away again in Margariettaville!


  • Blues at the Crossroads Half Marathon – Terre Haute, Indiana

I wanted to finish within the 4 hour time limit. And finish I did. I was slow but so proud!

  • Ladies and Gentlemen – Mr. Elton John! This is the 5th time I’ve seen Sir Elton in concert! However, this time I was literally 5 feet from the man! And I took my mom, aunt and BF, Nicole. So flippin’ awesome!

This picture was taken from my craptacular phone with no zoom. We were that close!

  • My baby brother turned 30!!!


  • Completely taken advantage of my one of my gypsy clients. I did nothing but work for this woman for peanut during the month of October. Lessons learned – boundaries, learning to say no, self-respect!
  • Freak out – my gypsy client was my main source of income. When we parted ways, I lost my income.


  • Miss Pam needs a job STAT! Let the job search begin….
  • Another race, Goose Poop Challenge with Heather McMahon.

And we're running!

  • Matt and Chris’s Wedding!
  • The worst interview in the history of the world! (I may have to post on this later.)
  • Wishbone 5K run Thanksgiving morning.


  • Still job searching…..
  • Surviving the holiday season.
  • Planning for a A-MAZ-ING 2012! (Resolutions to come!)

How would you classify 2011? Good? Bad? Challenging? Best Year Ever?